A SCOTTISH mum who suffered a suspected heart attack after being conned out of £17,000 by a dating site fraudster has issued a warning about online romance scams.
The woman, known only as Alison, spoke out in the run-up to Valentine’s Day as leading charity Advice Direct Scotland urged people to remain vigilant, with experts saying fraudsters are now using female-focused dating apps to exploit and deceive women.
Alison, 57, had suffered a family bereavement early last year when she connected with a man claiming to be an American professional on a website for women.
Over several months, the pair built trust, speaking frequently and having video calls that appeared to confirm his identity – eventually resulting in Alison agreeing to send him £17,000.
Last May, he had told her he was travelling to Northern Ireland and suggested the two meet.
By August, he claimed his bank account had crashed and asked her for the five-figure sum to buy machinery for a job.
Alison initially refused but later transferred the money after he sent his bank and passport details.
Soon after, he requested a further £7,000, claiming he was being held by customs and his passport had been taken.
Alison reported the scam to the police and her bank, and has since been receiving support from Advice Direct Scotland after borrowing money from friends.
Despite this, the man has continued trying to contact her, demanding more money.
Alison said: I feel so stupid but I was just trying to do the right thing and be a good person by helping someone out.
“I am not doing well mentally because of all this. It has taken a real toll on me. I was in hospital recently with a suspected heart attack. It is a nightmare.”
Alison added: “I have informed the bank and the police, but I feel as if my life is in ruins and I am just left in limbo.
“The app is designed so that women can make the first move and after I ticked that I liked him, he messaged me.
“He was American but said that he would be working in Northern Ireland and he wanted to come to Scotland to meet me.
“Eventually, after a month or two, he said his bank account had been frozen. He then said he needed cash for some machinery for a job.
“He kept begging and showed me what looked like legitimate bank details and a passport; so I sent the money.
“He sent flight times and said he would sort his banking issues and then come to meet me.
“But then he contacted me again, saying he was being held by customs who had taken his passport. He asked for another £7,000 to give customs officials for his release.
“I said no, and he sent a voicemail saying he was being beaten and urgently needed the money to be released.
“He has still been contacting me in the last few days. Now I don’t respond and just screenshot the messages.”
Advice Direct Scotland, which runs scamwatch.scot and consumeradvice.scot, is urging people to be extra cautious when speaking to potential partners online, and to seek help immediately if they suspect foul play.
A romance scam occurs when someone pretends to be romantically interested in someone to commit fraud.
Scammers often use flattery and “love bombing”, showering people with compliments and declarations of love early on to build trust and create a strong emotional connection.
They may also resort to blackmail, using compromising pictures or videos to extort money or silence those they target.
While scammers often focus on people who are older, disabled, or recently divorced or bereaved, anyone can be affected.
Fraudsters are skilled at manipulating situations to their advantage, making it difficult for people to recognise the deception.
Many victims feel too scared or embarrassed to ask for help, but support is available.
Hazel Knowles, senior project lead at Advice Direct Scotland, said: “Romance scams are a persistent issue throughout the year, but it is important to be particularly vigilant around Valentine’s Day, which can be exploited by scammers who prey on people seeking romantic connections.
“These fraudsters are always on the lookout for potential targets, using dating websites, social media, and other platforms to build trust and defraud people.
“It is important to stay vigilant and approach online interactions with caution.
“You should never share personal or financial information with someone you’ve only met virtually, and if you have any doubts about a person’s authenticity, carrying out thorough background checks is advisable.
“These scams can cause significant emotional and financial distress, leaving people feeling deceived and isolated.
“But it’s important to remember there is no shame in being scammed, and anyone who is worried or needs help can contact our specialist advisers for free, impartial and practical advice.”
Free, impartial advice is available via consumeradvice.scot by calling 0808 164 6000 or using web chat and email at www.consumeradvice.scot.
Anyone targeted by a romance scam should contact their bank immediately if they have shared financial details or transferred money and report the incident to the police.
Suspected scams can also be reported through the ScamWatch quick reporting tool at www.scamwatch.scot.
