“Lets not s*** outside my f****** shop yeah?” Shop owner outs “dirters” who have been using entrance as toilet

A FUMING shop owner has pleaded with “dirters” to “not s** outside my f***** shop” after sharing CCTV clips of the culprits in the act.

Secure Snack LDN owner Jake Chapman shared hilarious clips of himself giving David Attenborough-style commentary to the grim footage.

The 28-year-old from Dagenham in Essex exposed four separate women who had used his shop entrance to urinate and defecate over the last month.

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At the end of the tether, Jake decided to out the brazen culprits on Sunday by posting the CCTV footage on Facebook.

In one clip, one woman can be seen walking up Jake’s shop driveway before squatting down and defecating next to the shop door on Saturday night.

Jake later revealed he found “a massive turd” and used toilet paper on his doorstep the next day and almost stepped in it.

Another clip shows a trio of dressed up women each taking their time to urinate right at the front entrance of the shop last month.

Jake’s post, which included both incidents, was posted on Facebook on Sunday.

He wrote: “Calling all you lovely Dagenham ladies. Please stop using the entrance to my shop as a toilet.

“I’m expecting maximum shares people. Let’s name and shame these dirters.”

In the clips, Jake can be heard commentating over the clips.

In the clip of the mystery woman crouching down to relieve her bowels, Jake can be heard saying: “So check this out people , this is like the third time this has happened in like the last couple of weeks.

“Wait, wait, oh yeah that’s it, the knickers off. 

“Oh yeah, that’s it, nice big squat, look at the turd. Look at that aww.

“You filthy c***. Sorry for my language.

“Anyway people, the moral of the story yeah, lets not s** outside my f***** shop yeah.”

Jake then commentates the video clips showing the trio of women taking turns to urinate outside his shop.

He says: “There’s three lovely ladies having a quick p*** out here. 

“Oh look at this one, this one’s dancing while she’s p******. 

“Who is she eh? Who is she?” 

The grim footage has been shared across Facebook more than 800 times and attracted comments from shocked viewers.

Dan Mills wrote: “You sound like David Attenborough. But yes this is vile.”

Alfie Budge said: “She curled out a big one.”

Reece Latimer commented: “Leave toilet roll out for them the next time.” 

Crystal Knight wrote: “Dirty rotters.”

Ben Adams commented: “Dirty c*** didn’t even wipe. Filthy rat.” 

To which Jake replied: “In their defense they did wipe, I know this because they left the wipes there as well.” 

Speaking today, Jake said: “10am on a Sunday morning, I wasn’t expecting to have to clean up a grown woman’s number two.

“I’m lucky I didn’t step in it when I got out of my car that morning.

“It’s happened numerous times, it’s not often but it happens.

“I had to man up and clean it before we had customers turn up.

“We weren’t too fussed about the wee as you know we’ve all done a wee somewhere we shouldn’t, but the number two is a step too far.”