NewsScottish NewsBlogger mum gets support after losing her day-old daughter

Blogger mum gets support after losing her day-old daughter

A PREGNANT woman who blogged throughout her pregnancy has been flooded with messages of support after the baby died a day after being born.

Debbie Chalmers won hundreds of followers as she took to her blog to chart every stage in the growth of her unborn child.

But instead of announcing the start of a new life to her fans, Debbie, 31, had to inform them that her baby daughter Daisy had passed away.

 

Debbie posing happily as an expectant mum

 

Debbie, from Rosyth, Fife, has since been inundated with messages of sympathy, some of them from women who suffered the same tragic experience.

And since tragedy struck , the grieving mother has written a series of heartbreaking online letters to her late daughter.

A customer co-ordinator at Dunfermline’s Carnegie College, Debbie has two other children  – daughter Lizzie, 6, and a stepson Blake, 3.

She married her husband Douglas, 32, a year ago and they decided on their honeymoon that they were going to try for a baby.

 

Daisy

Her blog, Family Life In Fife, was originally set-up to share information on cooking and baking tips, but on 5 December 2011 she announced to the online community: “A bun in the oven… and I don’t mean baking! We’ve been delighted to discover that we’re expecting a new addition to our frugal family!  Yes, I am pregnant – 11 weeks!”

But after getting 35,000 page views charting the progress of her pregnancy, Debbie wrote earlier this month: “Our beautiful baby girl arrived on Tuesday 3 July at 0.33am after keeping us waiting 9 days over my due date.  We called her Daisy.

“The delivery went quickly and smoothly following a straightforward pregnancy. However, at birth Daisy was showing signs of being poorly and was transferred to the Special Care Baby Unit for some help.

“Sadly her condition worsened very rapidly.  The doctors were unable to save her and she passed away on Wednesday 4 July at 5.25am.

“Words cannot express how devastated and heartbroken we are feeling.  This is the saddest and darkest time of our lives.

“We are taking strength from the support and kindness of others around us at this incredibly difficult time.

“Thank you to all of you who sent messages asking how things are.  I’m very sad to be sharing such upsetting news.”

 

Support

Since the devastating news of Daisy’s death, followers of Debbie and the family have inundated the website with messages of love and support.

One follower, Dartford Warbler, said: “Life is being so cruel to you. You are in my thoughts. What a heartbreaking time. DWxx”

Penny said: “Heartbreaking. Had a lump in my throat whilst reading this. Wish I lived closer to wipe your tears and give you a big squeeze. My thoughts are with you and your family. Xxx

And fellow blogger Morgan said: “ I haven’t been reading your blog that long, but I connected with you as a fellow frugal person, and the Fife connection. I am so sorry to read about this devastating loss. I will be keeping you in my thoughts, Morgan x.”

Debbie said the support from her followers and even complete strangers is giving her strength.

She said: “Since then the support and kindness I received has been really very touching. These people are complete strangers to me, other than via social networking and blogs, but have taken the time to send condolences and messages of comfort at what has been such a traumatic time.

“I’ve found it helpful to share my story with strangers as they are a step removed from the intensity of the grief we find ourselves wading through and can offer practical, impartial advice and support.

“Just to know there are so many others out there who care has been a source of strength to me at this incredibly difficult time.”

 

Letters

In April preparations were underway for the arrival of wee Daisy.

Debbie posted at the time: “Last week I also received a parcel from a fellow blogger, Frugal Queen, containing a beautifully soft baby blanket knitted for me.  How kind and generous to send such a thoughtful gift to a complete stranger!

“I am delighted to have a lovely, handmade knitted blanket ready in anticipation of my little one arriving.  Thank you so much.”

But now her blog is filling with heart-wrenching letters to her lost daughter.

One, dated Friday 13 July, said: “What struck me was how much you looked like your sister when she was first born.  Amazing!  I was amazed.  Here you were; a part of me; a part of Dad; a part of your sister; a part of your brother.  The missing piece in our family jigsaw, linking us all together.

“I was taken to the ward and I went to sleep.  You weren’t beside me but I knew that you were here and you were safe.  Dad went home and he went to sleep.  He knew we were both in the hospital and we were safe.

“I’ll never forget those few happy hours where everything was ok and happy and the future was bright. Lots of Love. Mummy”

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